Do you still have hope in your life? I mean, do you believe in the coming of Christ in you? Are you still one of those who trust in deep transformation, or metanoia? What is your relationship with the second coming of the Saviour? Do you await Him only out there, or do you conceive that His coming can be present and evident to you if only you attended to the right place? It may be that He has come and comes at every moment, and we simply do not hear His quiet, silent and gentle voice because we are used to stridency.

We are sometimes so anaesthetised that everything that is soft, humble, welcoming and undemanding goes unnoticed. Have you seen how advertisements grow in noise, colour, and sudden, original appearances where you least expect them? That is to catch the attention of those of us who live immersed in mind-wandering. The constant rumination of the “inner dialogue” covers our perception and lulls us to sleep. Why does this happen? Because of the lack we have of meaning and of a fullness that does not depend on anything.

As long as I need something external in order to feel good, I am enslaved. Everything that happens keeps altering, influencing and affecting me. I live jumping from one desire to another, changing the object of my longing, because none fills me completely, or only for a brief moment. This matter of the next moment, the way we are always stretched “forward” into the future instead of simply being right now, shows us this automatism; it makes an inner emptiness evident to us.

But what can I do? For when I go “inward” in prayer, meditation or attempts at contemplation, I find restlessness, or at most a consolation that vanishes as soon as I leave the stillness.

The first thing is this, and it is unavoidable: to become aware of what we are really seeking behind all our activities. Whether these tasks are banal, consumerist, or holy and spiritual, what we seek is always the same: peace of heart, or the presence of God in us, or a gentle contentment in knowing ourselves beloved and sheltered children, free from any real danger to what we are. These are different words for the same thing, and it could be named in many ways. But what we seek is not what we seem to seek; in everything we are always seeking Him.

Whom are you seeking? What do you want above all else? The answer to these questions will set the tone of Advent for us, an opportunity to become aware of the one thing we love and long for behind all appearances.

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