It was a theme he never forgot in his guidance: the direction of inner energy. It was a kind of «technical» way of approaching the problem of how we look at the world, at life and at situations. «What you have to consider is where your vital force is heading, downward or upward…»; and to point to these heights was, for him, the same as speaking of levels of luminosity or of alignment with the divine will.

He told me that turning the downward direction into an «upward» force was a daily conversion. That it was not a moral problem but a functional one. It was the way in which the spirit, or the inner man, took command over the chaotic forces of the automatic/instinctive. Bringing peace in the midst of mental tumult, or order into the chaos of impulses, required a small instant of awareness that made it possible to reverse the direction in which the energy circulated: life, the sap of God that animated the body.

Also, when I questioned him about God’s presence within us, and how «the kingdom in the heart» could be found, he told me that Christ was one step away. That when a longing for joy or a yearning for happiness arose in me, that was God’s own voice in me. «It is not you who wants fullness; it is God calling you to Himself.»

So putting the best of myself into raising the energy and moving forward was answering that call. I really liked what he told me; it was a way in which I could understand the Mystery and not feel it to be incomprehensible or distant. The whole crux of the matter lay in that «click» that changed the direction. This required a heartfelt prayer or a small action done well, however minimal. Or a simple act of love, such as watering a little plant, stroking a pet, or giving an affectionate greeting to whoever lived with me.

From there, one’s outlook subtly changed and it was a slow but steady ascent. «Don’t start ruminating on the ills you think you suffer; raise your spirit, and only then, if necessary, will you be able to learn so as not to repeat them.» The view is much better from above, he would say, smiling. And he had a simple formula that dismantled my confused labyrinths, though I admit it was a little extreme, or might offend someone who did not know the affection with which he said it: «If you are anguished, you do not believe in God… because if you believe that God is, why are you anguished?»

In the end he always brought me back to the same point. Existence is not chance; it is love made manifest. But since we understand only a tiny part of the universal picture, we struggle in suffering. We mistranslate what happens by overlooking the spiritual nature of everything…

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